Journey of Sister 'Amal Loring' to Islam

Five years ago, Amal Loring converted to Islam. A year later she became second wife to her Emirati husband and has never been happier. “I was born into a middle-class family in the UK. At 29, I moved to Dubai with my then partner to take a job for a multinational software company. We got married in 1999 and I decided to retrain as a counselor. For many years we lived the typical expat life of Friday brunches and beach clubs. On reflection it seemed an empty existence.

“Our daughter was born November 9, 2001 and her birth coincided with so much negative press about Islam. As an expat I didn’t mix with the local community and had many preconceptions about Muslims – in particular about terrorism and the treatment of women. Yet my own culture was far from ideal. On visits back home I witnessed what I felt was a breakdown of society. I saw children with no respect for elders, binge-drinking, teenage pregnancy and increasing violence. It was not the life I wanted for my daughter or myself. I began to take more notice of the local culture and religion of Dubai, particularly the role of Islam.

“Word about my research got around and one day I received a call from Shaikh Saeed Bin Mohammad Bin Rashid Al Maktoum inviting me to his palace to discuss Islamic theology. We talked openly for hours. I discovered that rather than women being repressed and controlled, they are respected and treated as a precious jewel. So many things fell into place that day. Shaikh Saeed asked me several questions and, on answering them, he declared me a Muslim. In his presence I recited the shahada, accepting that there is only one God and that the Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) was his last messenger. From that moment my new life began.

“A Muslim woman cannot be married to a non-Muslim, which put an end to my already rocky marriage. Our then six-year old daughter stayed with me. In the beginning it was difficult. I never lost my faith but I did wonder if I’d done the right thing. I didn’t fit into my own culture but I didn’t feel entirely comfortable in my adopted one either. So much was unfamiliar, I was always tripping over my abaya and I was constantly stared at wearing it, being pale-skinned and blue-eyed. I soon chose to also wear the niqab, the facial covering that reveals only the eyes. Non-Muslims think it is oppressive but I see it as the opposite. It’s entirely my choice and I wear it because it stops the stares and gives me a sense of freedom and dignity.

“The transition from my old life continued to be difficult. I lost most of my expat friends because I no longer drank and didn’t socialise in mixed company. Back home my family and friends assumed I was having some kind of breakdown. I was accused of being a fool, a victim of brainwashing, even a suicide bomber. In my full abaya my own mother wouldn’t walk on the same side of the street as me. People refused to serve me in shops. I was once asked to leave a park, even spat at. I dealt with each stressful situation calmly because of the new inner strength my faith gave me.

“As soon as you become a Muslim there is much excitement in finding a husband. The introduction process in Islam was completely new to me – you don’t go to the cinema or have meals alone with a man. Instead a prospective husband will sit and discuss your values and beliefs. I was introduced to Mohammad and we quickly fell in love. His family and most of his friends accepted me without question. We were married in June 2008. I am his second wife. He lives with my daughter and me three days a week and with his first wife and their children for the rest of the time. I don’t get jealous – a Muslim husband treats all his wives equally.

“The line between culture and religion can sometimes be blurred. I now realise I have lived much of my life in ignorance and I feel compelled to bridge the cultural divide. My husband is very supportive of this wish. In 2009 I began a degree in Islamic Studies to give me the courage and knowledge to answer the many misconceptions about Islam. I have set up a Facebook support group, the New Muslim, and I volunteer at a local mosque. A big part of my work at Mind Body Dynamixs is also dedicated to bringing Dubai’s many cultures together.

“As a therapist, people come to me every day searching for happiness. By embracing Islam and marrying into the local culture I have found inner peace. My faith, my husband and my daughter are my inspiration. I am now content with myself and have never felt more understanding towards others. What I would say to anyone considering marrying outside their own culture is to not make hasty decisions – thoroughly research the culture you’re marrying into and then focus on the good points of the other culture and blend them into your own.”